Daily Horoscope

November 30, 2010
You're entering a cycle today that will allow you to express yourself more tactfully and appealingly. This influence lasts until January 7th. You are more persuasive, in a gentle way, and can more easily win others over for your ideas. You might also enjoy a more sociable energy - one in which you keep in better touch with people who make you happy. Learning comes more easily, although at times you can be a little lazy about following through on what you learn during this cycle. Creatively speaking, you're set to have an especially rewarding few weeks. If you write or sell in your profession, this is an especially good time for spreading the word.
Creativity: Excellent ~ Love: Good ~ Business: Good

http://www.cafeastrology.com/

I read my horoscope every day. Some think that it’s all a bunch of “hocus pocus” but, I can't seem to stop reading it. I am drawn to it; to the mystique of the connection of me to the message on the page. I read the first line, and every time I can relate to it instantly. Moving on to the next thought, I feel another emotional tie. Each line creates more positive inspiration for me to be myself and focus on being my true self. I am intrigued by how accurate I am being described each time I read the small paragraph.

Whether or not there is any validity in the art of astrology doesn’t matter to me. The fact that it creates a positive aura for me is all that I need to click on the link in my favourites. Making this connection first thing in the morning sets the tone of my day. Along with my Ezekiel bread with almond butter and a freshly brewed cup of coffee, my daily horoscope gives me a jump start to my day. True or false, valid or not, I am hooked.

       Virgo





Repelling and Attracting

I have finally learned how to deal with people who use passive aggressive behaviour to manage others in their lives. I don’t. I have come to the conclusion that just allowing them to do or say whatever they need to so they can feel good about themselves works quite well. Challenging their words or actions only propels them into a vicious cycle of more “p.a.” This swings towards nastiness and it becomes, obviously, personal. General accusations are stated in a public forum, and everyone knows who the targeted individual is amongst them. It becomes uncomfortable and hurtful.

I have decided that reacting in any way creates confrontation, and there is no effective purpose to the interaction. My energy is far more valuable than to be wasted on trivial dialogue whose sole purpose is to put me down and raise the attacker up. There have been many instances where I have attempted to provide these people with the boost they seem to need. My efforts are initiated from my heart, the intent inspired by my love. 

Unfortunately, I have thrown in the towel in attempting to put a positive spin on the work of the “passive aggressive”. They win, and I forfeit. They stand on the podium and I sit back and relax. They walk away feeling strong and in control, and I go on my merry way, seeking a different kind of person to interact with. I look for the one with a like mind and soul; one who is not seeking competition, but harmony. This person gives a compliment instead of a put down; offers help instead of a demand, a smile instead of a frown; a hug instead of arn crossing; a wink instead of a sneer; a thank you instead of a grunt.

Tomorrow will be a new day. I will ignore those who provide negativity and welcome all those positive.  As Christmas approaches, seek the company of those who raise you up, and remember to help others shine their light.

Creation and Therapy

Today I decided that instead of joining the army of shoppers at the outlet mall, I would hibernate in my house and "create". As a writer, I am familiar with the art of creating a story or an inspiration. However, creating something with paper, ink and a variety of medium is totally satisfying in an entirely different way. I had forgotten this until I was recently reminded by a fellow blogger. It has been a very long time since I pulled out my stamps and markers, glitter and glue, and I knew now what I would be doing with that box of unwanted Christmas trinkets that never seem to make it into my decorating scheme.

I was inspired by my friend and artist, Jocelyn of http://www.zendollworkshop.com/.  On November 3rd she wrote a post on her blog that described "tea staining" on tags. I instantly had a vision of Christmas present tags and what they would look like. My daughter and I always make our own tags using last year's Christmas cards. Albeit slightly creative, the activity is really an environmental recycling gesture. This year would be different. I was keen on the tea staining idea and so I contacted Jocelyn to get the step by step instructions. It seemed easy enough as she told me to “make the tea and dip the tag”. Perfect easy and it would add an old vintage look and feel to my Christmas tags.

I hadn't asked her what kind of tea would work best because I didn't think it would make a difference. I made 4 kinds thinking that would provide a variety of colour. Attaching the tags to ornament hooks and hanging them on the side of large tea cups worked well; I then waited for the staining to develop. The Zen Green tea created a beautiful obvious moss hue. The Liquorice tea provided a light brown tone and carried its scent with it. The Earl Grey black tea was gorgeous as its darker stain was warm and had an aged aura about it. The Acacia Berry was disappointing as after 15 minutes of soaking, the tags maintained their fresh white look as if they had never taken the tea bath at all. I glanced over to my coffee tray and noticed the small packets of Starbucks instant "Via" that I use when in desperate need of a quick caffeine fix. I wondered what kind of stain the coffee would create. The result; an amazing deep brown the colour of chocolate was produced, and I was proud of my spontaneous creation.

I then transferred the wet wonders on to a skewer and hung them to dry. Once dry, I will dust off the stamps that were used so many years ago, and create personalized messages with loved ones in mind. I will then collect all the little Christmas baubles that have lain lonely in boxes for years, and attach them to ribbon. Combined with my newly stained tags, they will find new homes on all the presents we have bought for family and friends.

This has been an amazingly therapeutic afternoon. The art of creation is truly relaxing and rejuvenating. Taking one more piece of advice from my friend and artist, I now plan on inviting some of my friends to join me around the dining room table for an afternoon of "tagging" and creating. I am sure that combined with a cup of tea and a scone, good conversation, and a laugh or too, this creative session will surely inspire us to solve some of our problems. And if it doesn’t, we will at least have spent some time not dwelling on them, if only for a few hours.

Saying Too Little or Not Enough....

Have you ever finished a conversation and felt like there were thoughts left unsaid? You wanted to say more, but the words just never came out of your mouth. Something kept stopping you from saying what you really wanted to communicate. You ended up just making small talk for an hour, and left feeling like you had so much more to talk about. You walk away and wonder if the other person felt the same.

Then there are those times when you say things that you wish you hadn’t. You go on and on about things that you don’t even care about. Sometimes you make comments just because you know that it’s what the other person wants to hear. It’s meaningless conversation, and it seems fake and shallow. When you part, you wonder if the other person caught on that none of what you said carried any substance at all.

What makes us say too much or say too little? How do we naturally monitor the sharing of our thoughts? I know that when I am with certain people, I feel comfortable talking about anything at all. I have a few girl friends I can trust with my deepest, darkest secrets; they're in a vault, never to be released. My husband is the person I share my feelings and insecurities with; without criticism or judgement. Then there are the people I meet throughout my day. I may know their first name, or not know their name at all. I know very little about them, and yet there is a bond between us that feels comfortable and reassuring. I look forward to seeing them, and I’m disappointed when I don’t.

Familiarity seems to be comforting and reassuring. Knowing what to expect creates the “good feel” that we all crave. It’s like walking through the door after coming home from a long vacation. You had a great time while away, but that first step back feels like putting on your pyjamas after a long day at work.

Maybe there is no need to place a meter on how much we say, think or share. Perhaps we need different people in our lives to meet our various social needs and human nature dictates which conversational path we take. To over think how much or how little you say probably ruins the flow of our words and thoughts. So, next time you bump into a friend, say what comes naturally and allow your inner voice to speak for you.

The Missing Piece

My son came home this week for the American Thanksgiving holiday, which explains my lack of blog posts.  It has been a joyous week with him back in the house.  When he is gone we all feel like something is missing, as if our family is incomplete.  Each of us misses him in our own way.  My daughter misses her brother in the evening; a time when they watch t.v. together and catch up on small talk and the kind of private conversations that siblings have.  My husband misses his son on the weekends when they discuss golf stats, upcoming tournaments; pretty much anything that involves golf.  There is definitely a void in Sunday's ritual of watching the Golf channel as his dad sits alone with no one to listen to his comments.  I can feel his emptiness.  Even the dog often sits outside his door as if waiting for his return.

I miss my son in my own way.  I miss making his favourite meals.  He is wonderful to cook for because he eats anything I make and always compliments me on my efforts.  I miss his good morning hugs, his good night kisses and his "I love you's" as he is leaving the house.  He is kind and considerate and never gives me cause to worry about him.  He is old enough to do as he pleases, and yet, he always lets me know his where abouts and when he can be expected to return.  He takes the time to sit and chat, and humours me when I bring up topics that don't interest him.  He never challenges me when I ask him to run an errand, and he offers to help in any way possible.  He is always true to his word.

We don't talk about how much we miss him when he is gone because we don't want to bring attention to something that makes us sad.  But each of us can feel the quiet in the house and the missing piece to our family's puzzle.  Tonight while the turkey roasted in the oven, the squash and apple baked, and the sweet aroma of rosemary and thyme filled the room he came in the kitchen and pulled me away from making the mashed potatoes.  He began to dance to a Michael Jackson song that my daughter put on and I followed his lead embracing his spontaneity.  My daughter joined in and we danced around the kitchen island to "Thriller" and "Billie Jean" as my husband and our parents watched in wonder.  Alas, Simon was home!!  If only for a few days, the family came together because of him.  What a great gift, this son of mine.



Thoughts and Reality

I have a renewed sense that all is well again in the world. After sitting with a friend last night for a while discussing all the negative energy that evolved around my family last week, it occurred to me that I was not following my own advice. When I go into the high schools and chat with the girls, I work very hard at enabling them to understand that what someone thinks about you is simply a “thought” and not necessarily real.

When I think back on the details of what had occurred, I realize that the stress I was feeling was coming directly from my reaction to the perception of other people toward my actions. Everyone close to me, including myself, kept telling me that I had good intensions, so there was nothing to be upset about. This is exactly what I discuss with the young girls who still struggle with maintaining a “cool” look or behaviour, rather than just being themselves; whatever that may be. I was doing the same thing that they do; I was reacting to what others thought about me rather than focusing on my good intentions at the time. There are those who are very angry with me and at what I had done, and that was slanting my judgement on the entire experience. I couldn’t get past it and I wanted desperately to “fix” it.

But how do you fix someone’s paradigm; especially when they are hurt and offended. You really can’t. It is ultimately up to them to take the next step and try to put themselves in your shoes, rather than try to find someone to blame. Anger is the defence mechanism that is created when we are fearful, and it always fails us. It provides moments of comfort and then it deceives by exhausting our souls. It is reactive and often mimics what we think we are upset about. Placing fault does not always erase bad memories. It simply provides retribution, but at what cost?

It is our integrity that becomes in jeopardy when we want someone to pay for their actions. We make choices that harm ourselves and others, and no one feels any better in the end. Retaliation is fleeting, exhausting and unfulfilling. And so, rather than continue to complicate something so very simple, I am letting go of this “incident” and chalking it up to something wrong that happened, but with all the right reasons.

Knowing

I took some time on the weekend to just “be”. What does that mean? Well, I just hunkered down and did some reading, made some nice comfort food, and watched some T.V. Placed no expectations on myself; I just did whatever came to me that didn’t require much effort. The only time I left the house was to do a little Christmas shopping with my daughter. Although I didn’t feel like it at the time, this proved to be the most therapeutic thing that I could have done. Not because I think that “buying” is an effective path toward healing one’s soul (although sometimes it does work!!) , but because we had so much fun together.

My daughter knew that my week had been anything but positive, and it was like she just figured out what was best for me. Much the way a mother cheers up a child who has lost a toy. I don’t think she did it consciously, and maybe she just wanted to go shopping, but small gifts come in the most obscure ways. She asked me if we could stop at Starbucks for a coffee, and I assumed that we would do the usual; grab a latte, get in the car and run our errands. But no, she wanted to just sit at a table and relax with the coffee. And so we did. We chatted about everything and nothing. We laughed at ourselves and others; we talked about some important topics and some things that didn’t matter. Finally, we decided it was time to move on. We did some of her shopping and, then we happened to walk by a rack of hats. Until that moment, our mood was light and calm; our day, uneventful, yet peaceful.

She grabbed a hat and pulled it over her head. It was plaid with grey fake fur and it not only covered her head, but it encompassed it and her ears, her forehead and part of her eyes, her large grin shining through. I looked at her, and uncontrollable laughter burst from my entire being. I was overwhelmed with the vision standing in front of me. She then reciprocated by joining in with a giggle followed by a snort. She grabbed her cell phone and proceeded to take a picture of herself; laughter. I grabbed another hat and exchanged it for the one she had on; another photo and more laughter. And thus the domino effect continued; hat, laughter, photo, hat, laughter, photo. We eventually had to leave as we could not control ourselves and we were causing a disturbance.

I left the store feeling exhausted, but rejuvenated. Once home, I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes. I reflected back on the scene at the hat store as if I was an outsider looking in. It made me chuckle quietly inside. I was amazed at the fact that my daughter had given me the opportunity to let go and enjoy. I think she really just wanted to go Christmas shopping, but then a part of me thinks it was as if she knew...............did she?

Always Having Fun!!!!

Friends, Wine and Brie

Last night I sat with some women. We drank wine and ate baked brie. We talked about hurt feelings, those on the mend and those already repaired. We laughed, cried, and solved the world’s problems all while watching episode after episode of Sex and the City.

I had been through some emotional turmoil, and was not sure if I even wanted to leave the house last night. For the last 3 days, I had talked and cried so much that I had to put ice packs on my eyes before I got ready to go out. I was so exhausted from all of the thinking and lack of sleep that I just wanted to put it all behind me. As much as I didn’t want to talk about it anymore, I knew that discussing my experience with my friends would bring more clarity to the situation and help me bring it to closure.

And it did. They empathized with me, but took it one step further by offering heartfelt suggestions. Once we covered the gambit of possible solutions and lots of hugs, the book was closed and laughter was abundant. And these are the people who I choose to be with. We don’t always agree with one another, but we always look for the one piece we can relate to.

That kind of respect comes from the love of a girl friend. When she doesn’t say, “you’re wrong”. When she values the fact that no one is the same, and, in fact, it is impossible not to be different. When she looks at you and sees all the goodness that you hold behind your exterior. When she understands that you deal with things differently than her, but that doesn’t make her right. When you can talk about how you really feel and know that it will stay in the room you said it in. When you can laugh your ass off about complete nonsense and all 4 of you get the joke.

And that’s what you see here; chemistry, comradery, the love of friends. So, get together with your girlfriends. All you need is a few cocktails, some good brie; everything else will fall in place.

Regret and Forgiveness

Yesterday was a bad day for many people. I don’t like saying those words because the message is such a negative one. I always tell people to find the positive in everything that happens but, I struggle to figure this one out. I did something that came from the depth of my heart and soul with the intention of goodness. As I tell people all the time, “how can you go wrong with that?” Well, you can. Without realizing what I had done at the time, I hurt people. My usual response to that would be, “if your intentions were good, you should not feel bad.” That may seem logical, but it’s just not always that simple is it?

I know logistically what went wrong yesterday as the sequence of events are now all coming together. Interpretation of communication presented a different picture from reality and the resulting reactions were harmful. Although unintended, they inflicted pain on people who did not deserve such grief, especially at this time.

I review the events over and over in my thoughts and wonder when and at what point could the negative outcome have been avoided. Who was to blame? Everyone involved moved forward with concern and love, and yet we stumbled. We all dared to do the right thing, and yet we fell. We tried to correct it, and yet we lay there unable to replace the steps we had taken.

I am grateful that my conscious has reacted with such instinctual regret as it reiterates that I have an abundance of goodness in me. I understand the reaction of those hurt, and the pain they are experiencing which is why I am having a difficult time getting past this. I realize now that there is no explanation for what happened, and maybe, because our intensions were good, it could not have been avoided. Perhaps when people are trying to do the right thing, there is no blame to be made when events move in the wrong direction. Yet, our human side, our caring intuitive side, our nurturing self directs us to request forgiveness so that we can all move positively and lovingly forward and back to where we once were.

Voo Doo and Sponges

I just came back from presenting a “Dare to Manage Stress” workshop to a group of college students. They were so attentive and respectful; really trying to absorb my “voo doo” rituals and paradigms on managing stress or our perception of it. I was incredibly impressed and left there with a feeling of great gratitude and satisfaction. My goal is that if I only touch one person in a positive way at each of these meetings, I have done my job. Remarkably, not one woman challenged me on my views or opinions. One or two disagreed and voiced her opinion, but none of them brought it to a level of confrontation.  They even sat quietly and reflectively through a meditation activity!

I thought about why this was so. How often do you have 25 women in a room with nary the sound of a cough? When I was a young teen, my entire unconscious being evolved around being right. I could argue my parents into tears and none of my boyfriends ever had a chance of winning an argument because my voice would tire them out before they even had a chance. After much contemplation, I have to believe that it is the result of what I have predicted all along; this generation is craving the balance they have never had the opportunity to experience. It’s like it’s an innate desire, and they don’t even realize what their minds and bodies are yearning for. Once they hear what they are capable of creating, they are drawn to it like puppies to petting. Finding out that you can be empowered without being loud is a huge revelation.

And so I have confirmed the fact that I have chosen the right path, and I will continue to allow my intuition to guide me. Of all the things that I have allowed to guide me in my life, my feelings have never failed me. I look in my day timer and see that there are no presentations scheduled for the next 2 weeks. Is it time for a break, or should I seek out the next group of sponges? Onward and upward.........but first a little rest.

The Greatest Gifts come in Ugly Packages

Having had many people comment on how confident I must be to publically display my thoughts on my blog, I realized how little my readers really know about me. I suppose I feel better now about releasing my feelings into cyber space than I did when I first created my blog, but I do still say a little prayer each time just before I press the “publish post” button.

I remember the day I spent creating the blog, moving step by step through the process of creating gadgets, profiles, favourites lists, music play lists and comment boxes. This was fun and exciting. It was the next day that I realized what I had got myself into. This was the day that I had scheduled the writing of my first post. Writing it was the easy part. I was determined and careful to write each phrase with the reader in mind while ensuring that my view point was embedded in the message. Checking spelling and grammar, I read and re-read that piece at least 10 times. I was happy with the end result and cut and pasted it into the “post” box. I looked at it, and felt proud of what I had created. All I needed to do was press the “publish post” button. All I had to do was send my thoughts on to the internet airways. All I needed to do was share my inner most feelings with anyone who felt like reading them. This required moving outside my comfort zone in a big way.

And how did I suddenly muster up this courage? Well it didn’t come suddenly and it didn’t come quietly. It came to me long after receiving a gift that was disguised as a disease. Unbeknownst to me, this was the best present that had ever been delivered to me. At the time, I didn’t think the surprise was very positive. Its arrival initially disempowered me and pushed me into a very passive place. I didn’t like what I was given and I refused to accept it. I thought if I ignored it, it might go away. But it didn’t; it wanted to stay with me. And so, as much as I didn’t like the present, I befriended it because as time moved forward, it became very clear that it wasn't going away.

And so, I embraced it. I got to know everything about its character and personality and I welcomed it into my body and my life. I decided that instead of trying to return something I had no chance of giving back, I would welcome it and allow it to be a part of me. This may sound like a logical, easy decision, but it required more courage than I have ever had to use for anything in my life. Learning to live with my disease and all of the changes that came with it required more self confidence than I thought I had.

It took about a year for us to fully understand each other, and we now live quite comfortably together. Its a give and take relationship; a love hate friendship.  I surrendered myself to my gift, and as a result, the gift kept giving. It taught me to be patient and kind. It showed me how to be understanding and empathetic. It instilled an abundance of faith and trust in me towards others. It enabled me to love everyone, even those who could not love me back. This gift gave me the ability to be grateful for the smallest of blessings. These are the gifts that we search for our whole lives and don’t even know we are looking for. It is because of this unwelcomed gift and everything else that followed its delivery that I have the confidence and courage to write in my blog.

"To Sleep or Not to Sleep"

Today started with an early morning driving my daughter to work for 6:30. I usually crawl out of bed and quietly jump in the car with my pyjamas on and a scarf wrapped around my neck to keep me cozy. I then come straight back and, if I’m lucky, my dog will have slept through the entire event, and I can sneak back to bed for another hour. Unfortunately, today didn’t work out that way. When I returned, I opened the basement door slowly and made sure to close it without making a sound. Tip toeing up the stairs, I was hopeful as I didn’t hear any movement on the hardwood above or the tingling of Jake’s tags. Half way up the stairs I looked toward the second floor and there he was, sitting on the mat with his ears perked up and fully awake. I smiled in spite of myself as I traded the extra hour sleep for a freshly brewed pot of coffee, some toast, the morning paper and a cuddle from my spaniel.

An hour later I was wide awake from too much caffeine and “man’s best friend” was fast asleep on the cushion beside me. I decided to take advantage of my energy surge and pulled out my favourite banana bread recipe. While it baked, I cleaned the bathroom and then emptied the dishwasher. Once the kitchen was tidied up, I threw a load of laundry in and ironed a few shirts. By now it was 9 a.m. and the effects of the Starbuck’s Christmas Blend had worn off. I peeked in the living room to check on Jake; still snoozing. I optimistically pivoted and began to move toward the bedroom. Sliding under the duvet and cradling my pillow under my neck I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that I might get a 30 minute nap in.

I just started drifting off when I heard the jingling of the bell on the back door. The sound of the bell pulled me out of my relaxed state, but I was still hopeful that it wouldn’t ring again. No such luck; Jake’s nose hit the bell again and with more force. He needed to pee. Maybe if I just ignore it, he will hold it and go lay down. Wrong again; he smashed the bell so hard that it hit the door twice and the vibrations filled my head with guilt. I threw the warm covers off and pulled my sweater over my head. Shuffling into the kitchen, Jake turned his head and looked at me as if saying, “It’s about time”. Opening the door, he ran down the stairs into the backyard.

Watching him from the window, he made me smile as he chased a squirrel, peed on my evergreen and then sat in the middle of the yard with his nose in the air. I looked at my watch and realized that I needed to get showered and ready for company coming for brunch. Jake scratched at the door and I let him in. I then got ready and on my way to the kitchen walked by the living room. The sun was shining brightly where my puppy laid trying to catch as much heat from the rays as possible. As I turned around I could hear him snoring loudly.  For a while there I actually thought that when my company left I might sneek a little shut eye. Who was I trying to kid; I knew that at that point my sweet dog would be ready for a walk and he wouldn't take no for an answer.  I guess, as usual, sleep will have to wait.  Sweet dreams every one.  xo

Being the Same and then Different

Remember as a teenager how your whole world evolved around “fitting in”? My memories are of working really hard to be the same as everyone else rather than different. The idea of picking out my daily outfit because I liked it never entered my mind. I only wanted to look like all the rest of the girls amongst my social circle. I gave them license to be the fashion police, and followed along by buying whatever they deemed to be the style of the week.

My hair was a problem because I didn’t have the kind of hair that I could grow long and style the way the divas did and I so longingly wanted to resemble. It was fine and limp and couldn't hold the Farrah Fawcette flip back style that I wanted to blow in the wind as I walked to the bus after school.  It had a “beige” tone that simply blended in to the rest of what I considered to be bland and boring. I was relieved when Barbra Streisand started dating her hair dresser, Jon Peters. She introduced us less “Barbie” like featured gals with a hair style that I knew I could pull off because I was often told that I resembled the awkwardly attractive super star. Now, I would consider this a compliment, but back then I was insulted by the comparison. However, I welcomed the permed “do”, and added some “streaks”, as we called them then, at my hairstylist’s suggestion.

Copying the “popular” girls’ attire and a new hair style moved me up the ranks of high school’s social ladder, and I experienced the phenomenon of acceptance. Surprisingly, this achievement did not provide me with lightning bolt happiness, but I was unable to understand the concept of why. Alas, 35 years later, the same trend exists and is going strong. Instead of Calvin Klein jeans, Madonna like leggings and sinched shirts, the teens today are following their peers by purchasing Coach bags, Juicy charms, and Lulu Lemon pants. Uggs are spotted on every corner, and Blackberrys are no longer only for the affluent business man as BBMing is the high schooler’s main mode of communication. It’s still all about fitting in as they walk around like Stepford children with their flat ironed hair freshly highlighted and smoothed down with must have Aragon oil.

In 20 or 30 years they will understand that being the same was much more work than being different. And, taking it one step further, that being your self is much more fulfilling and fun than trying to be someone else. Eventually, they will find out that friends accept you for all of your differences, as well as, for what you may have in common. Wouldn’t it be great if our sons and daughters figured this out a little earlier in life? Is it possible to change this trend? Are they capable of understanding this concept? More importantly, are they willing?

Irony jumps out at me as I move easily into my 5th decade of life. Where I used to look in my closet and pick out a pair of jeans and shirt that would create as close an image to Brooke Shields as possible, I now choose the outfit that reflects my personality and mood that minute or day. Where I used to take into consideration whether or not my boyfriend and later, my husband would agree with the hair style I chose or the shoes I buy, I now simply pick the style that I like and the colors that give me that "feel good" I crave. Comfort is a key consideration, and labels are no longer in the cards unless I actually like the clothes they are stitched to. Incredibly, all my friends still love me and my husband hasn’t left me yet. The only criticism I get now and then is from my teen aged children, but I don't change because of their feedback, and they actually compliment me more than I ever thought they would.
xo

My Mentor

When thinking about who I consider my mentor to be, I am stuck as there are so many people who I look up to. Some are older than me and some much younger. I find it difficult to choose just one individual as the person who has taught, guided or inspired me. As I reflect on a number of people in my life, I cannot narrow it down to one as I have a mentor who represents each aspect of my existence.

As you move through the weeks heading toward Christmas, remember to keep your days and thoughts in balance as best you can. Take the time to reflect on all of the wonderful people in your life and how they have contributed to the many pieces of who you are as a whole person. Take the time to smile at a stranger and welcome a new friend in to your life.

Here are a few of my mentors:

My husband who taught me to be a woman of great integrity. Forever choosing to make choices that reflect my own values without compromising my true self, my family or friends.

My son who taught me to be my authentic self and to believe in my dreams.

My daughter who taught me how to figure out that life can have many paths and it is possible to find joy in each one of them.

My mother and father who taught me that longevity in a relationship would include some turbulence along the way.

My mother in law who taught me that being unselfish is extraordinarily complimentary.

My sister in law who taught me that giving more than you receive provides great joy.

My sister, Emily who is no longer with us, taught me that the greatest gifts come from my children.

My sister, Fran who taught me that letting your children go is the most difficult thing in the world, but that they are always with you no matter how far away they may be.

My niece, Jacqueline who taught me that being courageous when confronted with adversity will give you great confidence and strength, and that the comfort of a friend is the icing on the cake.

My aunt, Rita who taught me that being a mom can be challenging and rewarding at the same time, and that if you follow your heart, you have done the best you can.

My friend, Jane who taught me that every one deserves to be themselves and follow their own happiness, wherever it may take them.

My friend, Jocelyn who taught me to be my true self and to never deviate from that plan, and that friends may be absent for a while and then pop up when you least expect them to.

My friend, Teri who taught me the meaning of loyalty, trust and friendship.

My friend, Alison who taught me how to take the time to figure out who I am and to find joy in my life wherever I can.

My friend, Kate who taught me how to be brave and face life head on, and that nothing in life is that important to feel that bad.

My friend, Janet who taught me that it is never to late to change your path, no matter what or how long it takes.

And my friend's daughter and my friend Angie who taught me that you can figure all of this out at a very young age, survive and be happy.

Lastly, all the people who I haven't mentioned who I learn something from every time we meet and speak.

Lots of love to everyone in my life and to those who have yet to enter into it!!!!  xoxo

xoxo

Outlet Malls, Abundance and Gratitude

After just returning from a spectacular holiday, I sit at my little desk and reflect on how grateful I am for the time spent with my husband and our two amazing friends. Looking out the window of my office provides me with a shivering scene complete with a thin layer of frost on the grass and neighbours bundled up to compensate for the shock of the change in temperature. A far cry from the 40 degree weather we enjoyed in the desert climate of Palm Springs, or as we called it, “Paradise”.

While en route to our sunny destination, the only vision I had was laying by the pool, a cocktail in my hand, palm trees swaying in the gentle breeze and the sun shining above. Relaxation at its best with perhaps a little shopping mixed in for pleasure. Because all four of us LOVE to shop, we were more than happy to take a trip to the local outlet malls. I know the words “outlet mall” may make you shudder as you see row after row of the same stores that you see in every city that hosts one of these vast retail villages. But no, close your eyes and envision this, Juicy Couture, Prada, Coach, J Crew, Banana Republic, Fossil, Ed Hardy, Ugg, Gucci, Nine West and so much more. Unbelievable!! You can understand how a few hours at 3 large premiere outlet malls became a daily outing.

We laughed as each day we decided would be our last drive over to the enticing menagerie of label heaven. Once back at the hotel, I felt small waves of selfishness for all that I had bought. And yet, after a great dinner, some wine, a good night’s rest and a morning walk or run, along with a coffee at the local coffee shop, my feelings of spending regret dissipated. A quick swim and a shower and we were ready for the 20 minute trek back for more.

I am actually not a high end “label” kind of gal, but I think that the reason is because I really normally can’t afford these items of quality and beauty. Once in the throes of massive crowds in a 70% sale at a Coach outlet, it is hard to fight the bug of “want”. It was contagious and I kept telling myself that I didn’t need anything else. Then the almighty justification wave crept over me. My kids!! I can buy them their Christmas gifts here and save a lot of money!! Perfect; one for her and one for him, another for her and another for him, and so on and so on.............. Again back at the hotel I marvelled at how well I had done. I laid everything out on the bed and showed my husband my collection of shopping treasures. He laughed and asked me how we were going to bring it all home. Not to worry; I can fit them all in my suitcase............

As it turned out I learned a couple of lessons. Pack minimally and use a larger suitcase than you need. Bring another larger bag, but still carry on size, for items that you purchase while on vacation. We took one last drive over to the outlet mall out of necessity. I needed to make one final purchase; another suitcase to carry Christmas home. I’m not really sure if I saved much money during this shopping excursion with the added cost of the extra suitcase and its subsequent check in charge at the airport. What I do know for sure is that I had a great time and I can check this experience off, along with the camel ride, as another one of those “feel good” things that I have done.

Just a quick note....

to let you know that I may not be posting again until November 7th as I am on holidays.  If I get some time, I will get to some writing because I am missing my blog and followers. 
Have a great and balanced week!!!!
diana xo