I have finally learned how to deal with people who use passive aggressive behaviour to manage others in their lives. I don’t. I have come to the conclusion that just allowing them to do or say whatever they need to so they can feel good about themselves works quite well. Challenging their words or actions only propels them into a vicious cycle of more “p.a.” This swings towards nastiness and it becomes, obviously, personal. General accusations are stated in a public forum, and everyone knows who the targeted individual is amongst them. It becomes uncomfortable and hurtful.
I have decided that reacting in any way creates confrontation, and there is no effective purpose to the interaction. My energy is far more valuable than to be wasted on trivial dialogue whose sole purpose is to put me down and raise the attacker up. There have been many instances where I have attempted to provide these people with the boost they seem to need. My efforts are initiated from my heart, the intent inspired by my love.
Unfortunately, I have thrown in the towel in attempting to put a positive spin on the work of the “passive aggressive”. They win, and I forfeit. They stand on the podium and I sit back and relax. They walk away feeling strong and in control, and I go on my merry way, seeking a different kind of person to interact with. I look for the one with a like mind and soul; one who is not seeking competition, but harmony. This person gives a compliment instead of a put down; offers help instead of a demand, a smile instead of a frown; a hug instead of arn crossing; a wink instead of a sneer; a thank you instead of a grunt.
Tomorrow will be a new day. I will ignore those who provide negativity and welcome all those positive. As Christmas approaches, seek the company of those who raise you up, and remember to help others shine their light.
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