Look Into My Eyes

Have you ever moved through your day and taken note of how many times you ask, "how are you?"  I sat in a local coffee shop one morning and listened as each customer progressed to the cash register and asked, "how are you?"  If the customer did not initiate the question, it was sure to to be asked by the clerk.  Once I noted the repetitive question, I paid more attention and came to realize that neither party was asking with much interest; it was simply a polite, habitual gesture, usually asked while completing another task; getting out a wallet or ringing in the transaction.  I wondered how often I ask this question in a day, and whether or not I dare to take the time to really care what the answer is.  After testing myself for a couple of hours, it became clear ~ if you do not look directly into someone's eyes and ask them any question, she will not take the time to tell you the true answer; she will just give you a quick statement to move you along.  She does this without thinking.  It is a behavioural response given intuitively because your tone, physical stance and where you are looking indicate that you really don't care what her answer is. 
It is a bit of a joke in my house that if you go anywhere with me, it will take longer than expected because people always have a story to tell me.  It is now very clear to me why this occurs; I take the time to stop doing what I am doing, stand in front of the person I am addressing and look directly in her eyes, and I then ask, "How are you doing"?  From that I receive the answer that she thinks I want; the truth.  This is what I want because if she is having a great day, it will transfer on to me and others; if she is having a difficult day, I may be able to console or inspire her.  This takes time, effort and genuine caring; difficult tasks in a very busy world, but well worth the comfort you will receive by showing someone that you really want to know how she is.
I think you will be surprised by the impact this simple act will change your day.  So, I dare you to take the time today to stop and look into someone's eyes and ask, "how are you?" like you really want to know.