Research Project

The heat has lifted, and the rain has been falling for 2 days. Just over a week away from September 1st ; the leaves will be turning soon. There is a shift in personalities as the seasons change and everyone prepares for new activities. We move from a summer, relaxed mode to the hustle of getting things done and more scheduled activities. Sadness of a summer gone by is replaced by the anticipation of new beginnings. When I walk out on to the porch to retrieve the newspaper I stop to smell the start of the fresh fall air; I can feel it coming, breathe deeply in and out.

This is my season. It is short, but it is the time of year when I feel the most alive. I was born September 3rd, I am a Virgo. Born right in the middle of my zodiac sign, I am the poster child of Virgos! To everyone around me, I present a calm and together exterior. But on the inside, I have an intense mind constantly trying to figure things out. I am a deep thinker who likes to analyze, improve and perfect. I easily tire myself out as I won’t stop until I get my perception of what it is, right.

Like any project I undertake, I have recently decided to research “me”; how I think, what motivates me, why I do what I do. What prompted this? My motivation was the revelation that my relationships with those close to me were becoming uncomfortable and strained. I could not ignore this change as these people are extraordinarily important to me. I was reacting defensively; trying to “survive” conversations and interactions. I couldn’t fight my feelings, but I couldn’t explain or justify them either. I had to be me, but I didn’t understand who I was anymore. Somewhere along the way, I had lost a piece of myself. I needed her back, and I was fighting for my life.

This became the most important endeavour that I have ever delved into. Being a Virgo, I jumped in with both feet and no life jacket. One thing I know for sure is that I was scared to death. Unveiling my deepest thoughts and feelings, and recognizing my insecurities is not a Virgo trait. We do not want anyone, especially ourselves, to see what we perceive to be flaws or faults; we ignore them; we strive for perfection in all areas of our lives. We carry a shield to protect us from vulnerability. We are always fine.

But, don’t be deceived; we are not fine all the time. None of us are. Throwing zodiac signs aside, as human beings we are all in need at some point in our lives.  Sometimes, we need to unveil our fears and sometimes, we need to do the research for ourselves and those we love so, that we can be the true friends that we should be. Making assumptions is the easy way; it justifies not taking the time to care.  Remember that the wrapping paper makes what could be an ugly gift, very pretty.  Loving someone includes following your intuitive compass; no one should ever stand alone when in need, whether they express their need or not.

My self-therapy is ongoing and extremely insightful; I have and continue to discover a lot about myself; . It has helped me to grow, to be more forgiving of myself and others, and to welcome change. It has opened my mind and heart to take the time to really get to know the people in my life. Investing in the research of another is the greatest gift you can give yourself and someone you care about, including yourself. It enables you to provide them with what they need without them asking for it. They do not feel like they are letting their guard down; it is non-threatening and unspoken. It is a code of love.

Whether you are a Virgo, Scorpio or an Aries, don’t underestimate your ability to make a difference in your life or the lives of others. Taking the time to follow your heart chakra and dig deep beyond the facade of someone’s self-protection is a reflection of genuine love and caring.

It’s September; changing of the seasons. Dare ya..................

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xTcOP2CZmpM  
September in the Rain ~ Dinah Washington (classic!!!)