Christmas Eve

Tonight, I spent 5 hours with a woman who was experiencing her first Christmas without the love of her life of 59 years. My mother in law lost her husband this past May, and was determined to have her children and grandchildren at her home for Christmas Eve, as has been the custom for many years. She is 80 years old. I entered the living room, the last to arrive, and felt the loneliness that she was feeling. The void was not easy to see as she was focused on the task at hand, ensuring that everyone was fed and happy. However, the emptiness was evident by her demeanour and her tired, strained expression. We all knew that she did not sleep well last night.

My father in law always began the Christmas celebration by giving each of us an envelope with a cheque in it. He would always accompany his generosity with a statement expressing that he had not intended on following through on this tradition this year, but had changed his mind at the last minute. Fulfilling my father in law's role this year, my mother in law continued this tradition this year, and it was an act difficult to emulate as her heart was filled with loneliness and heartbreak. I am so proud of her ~ for her courage and for her loyalty to her husband's wishes; the money is irrelevant.

I am also deeply touched by the fact that my 80 year old mother in law took the time to go out into the shopping war zone and personally choose a beautiful jacket for me from my favourite store. Words cannot express how touching and thoughtful this was. My daughter recently told me that the best part of Christmas is taking the time to find out what someone wants, what someone really likes, and then watching the expression on their face when they open the gift you have chosen specifically for them. My mother in law did that for me. For that I am eternally touched and grateful!!

Tomorrow, she is coming to share in our family Christmas celebration. Some day, I hope to be a woman with such great integrity as my husband's mother.

I wish you all a Christmas filled with the love of family and friends, and I hope that you all have someone as amazing as my mother in law in your life.